i named him gus

This picture was included in the signature of an email I received at work today. I'm a little creeped out right now.

How about you?

watcha thinkin' about ash?

Ima thinkin' about....

* Dying my hair back to blonde. I'm kinda sick of it right now. It is however very possible that the fact that I have major root growth is the cause of my sickness... very possible indeed.

(please disregard my stoned look, I was really, REALLY tired)

* I finished my taxes today. Yes you can and should be jealous. Bahahahahahahahahahahaha!!! Just joshin'. I'm getting some moneys back which is exciting. I am thinking I may give some of it to my brother. It feels right. I'm not sure if he would accept it though. Perhaps I should do it anonymously?

* I need to buy some socks. My feet are fuh-reezing! Which reminds me, I really wish I could wear toe socks. They look SO comfy! Sadly, I have weird feet, well toes, but weird feet too. Did you know that my grandpa once spent 15 minutes making fun of my toes? No lie! He said that the rest of my freakish toes gang up on the baby one and bit it in half! I should post a pic of them sometime so ya'll can be grossed out

:0)

* I had a day dream today where Mr. Handsome walks into the break room while I am preparing one of my delicious sandwiches. He comments on how delicious said sandwich looks so I offer him half of it. He accepts (after a little convincing) and then he and

I sit down at the table. He exclaims that it is the most amazing sandwich he has ever had and then declares his undying love for me.

* I want a dog. A lot. Like a whole lot.

* I'm going to be a quarter of a century this year. And I won't be even remotely close to being done with school. That scares me. My BIO class scares me too. I need to get a B. The average grade is a C-. Scary? Yes.

* I really wanna see this movie. It's a book in the series that I mentioned a while back.

* I own a Ravenclaw tie. What? You don't know what Ravenclaw is? Pffft, you are so not allowed to read my blog anymore. Leave. Now. Seriously dude.

just joshin'

Ravenclaw is one of the four houses of Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry. One of the best Ravenclaws would be Luna Lovegood. Yeah, she is awesome like a blossom. Dandy like candy. I named one of my snakes after her. She was a very cute snake. I miss her muchos. Anywho, I own this tie and I am trying to find ways to work it into my everyday wardrobe. Haven't really come up with anything yet but one day, it will happen and I will take a pic of it and post it on my blog :0)

Ooo, speaking of HP, I once wrote a discussion essay about how the first Harry Potter book/movie relates to social groups and resocialization. It was pretty darn good if I say so myself.

*kloveyabye*

it's a monetary matter and it's time to get real

I got paid today and after paying all my bills I am left with $12. That $12 will need to be used for groceries and gas. Seriously. I'm not even joking. I think when I looked at that number I cried a little.

I'm not even sure how it's possible that I could have so little left. It's not like I have a low paying job. I make good money. Not a huge amount of money but enough that I should be able to live fairly comfortably if I shared a place with a roommate. You know what the main issue is? Debt. Yep that's right, I have debt. A freakishly large amount of debt that I try not to think about all while trying somehow to pay it off. Let's break it down cuz heaven knows that I need to get real with myself, pronto.

1. I currently have ... *whimpers* roughly $13,340 worth of debt from credit cards and my car loan. Please excuse my language but holy friggin' shit! Yeah, no wonder I have no money.

2. I pay $750 a month just towards these bills. This doesn't include car insurance or any of the other bills I have.

3. I think it's safe to say that I have a problem. I know I'm not good with money. I've never been good with it, even when I was a kid. I always spent my allowance on the weirdest, stupidest non-essential things and then would wonder where all my money went.

A lot of this debt came from when I was 18 and 19. As everyone knows, when you're 18 all the credit card companies start sending you offers. The smart thing to do is to not accept any of them or if you do (to build credit) you make sure that your spending does not exceed your ability to pay off your card each month. I, being the lame person I was/am, decided to accept all of the offers. I then used said cards for everything, especially treating my friends to stuff. I was the oldest of the group, we were all still in high school. No one had any money so I paid for everything. It was easy. I then paid for a couple of semester of college, a laptop and a whole bunch of other things that I don't recall. I also accepted and used every credit limit increase I was offered.

The next part of the debt came when I got my car. One thing for which I am not ashamed of. I love my car and it offers me freedom that I wouldn't otherwise have. However, I did spend a butt load of money on vacations this year, especially in San Francisco. I think it was somewhere around $1,500. Don't bother asking where it went because I have no idea.

3. I am actively working on getting it paid off. Of the five bills that I pay that make up that my debt I do double the required payments for three of them. So, lets take my AMEX bill. The monthly payment is $45 but instead I pay $100. Why? Because you will never get out of debt if you only pay the monthly fee. I can thank Suze Orman for that lovely little tidbit.

Hopefully, by doing this I will be able to pay most if not everything off within 18 months. I know I am being very optimistic here, especially since I have not included interest in any of my "calculations", but one of the larger payments will be paid off in November of this year (I know this for a fact) and so I am planning on taking that extra money and putting it towards paying the other bills faster.

4. The only way I could even remotely be able to pay this amount towards my bills is because of my mom. She let me move back in a couple years ago for several reasons, one of which was so that I could pay off my debt. I am seriously grateful to her for letting me live here rent free while I get my finances in order. She is awesome like unto a blossom.

5. Why even try to pay it off especially when it leaves so little money for other things? Well, I'm doing it for many reasons really. Mainly, I don't want to be enslaved to someone else. I don't want all of my hard work to end up in someone else's pocket, especially when that's someone else needs my money a lot less than I do. I also want to get married at some point in my life and with all of the baggage I already come with I don't want to bring my debt into my marriage. Marriage is hard enough as it is without adding money issues to it as well. Lastly, this debt is my problem. I am the one who got myself into this situation and I need to be responsible and get myself out of it.

Another reason as to why I have so little left in my checking account is because I paid tithing. You seriously have no idea how big of a thing this is for me. I honestly don't remember the last time I paid my tithing. I always felt that there was no way I could ever give up that money because I needed it to much. Certainly more than Heavenly Father or the church would need it. But, when I was thinking back on 2009 when I was setting my 2010 goals I remembered all of the lessons in Sunday school and sacrament meeting (when I went) about how much people were blessed just by paying their tithing. I remember one Sister said that she sat down one month and wrote out all of her bills that she had to pay including her tithing. She said that there was no way she should have been able to pay for everything with what she was making but that somehow she was able to. Somehow the small amount of money she got each pay period was able to pay everything in full and still have some left over. It was a miracle. A work of God.

I hope and believe that if I do as I am supposed to, Heavenly Father will help me. I decided that even though paying my tithing makes it so that I only have $12 in my checking account, whatever blessings that come from that sacrifice will be worth all the money in the world.

That is how awesome this gospel is. That is how unbelievably awesome God is.

Oh, so if any of you have good ideas on how I can improve my financial situation please do advise. I need all the help I can get!

*kloveyabye*

directionally challenged

I got lost on my way back home from school tonight. TWICE.

You see, my school is way, way far away from my abode but it is a mere 3 miles or so from the new In 'N Out Burger joint. So after class I take a little detour and stop by to get some tasty grub and then make my way back home. It had been a long day and I needed something to cheer me up. The time called for none other than the JoBros. I was searching for my cd all through waiting in the line, ordering and getting my food from the pick up window. I finally found it as I was turning onto the road towards the freeway entrances. I was a little preoccupiedwith trying to get the cd in and decided to take the closest exit to me (the one on the right side of the street) which for some weird reason I thought would take me north (the exit on the left side of the street).

Things are good. Nay, things are great. I turn up the volume and sing as loud as I can with the music, happy to be on my way home after a long day of work and school. Then I realize I got onto the southbound entrance. I quickly get into the right lane and wait for the next exit to come up. Not a big deal, right? Well, I take the exit, flip a U-ey (since this road is one of the ones that have both north and south bound entrances on the same side of the street) and then get back onto the freeway.

I'm chugging along, singing, drinking my soda glad that I am finally on my way home. After a little while I pass Ikea. I look at it and think hmmm, I don't remember passing Ikea on the way down here. Maybe I just missed it when I got turned around. I have never actually been to Ikea so I have no idea what it's exact address is. All I know is that it is somewhere between my house and my grandma's.

I continue driving and singing and then look up to see a sign that says "Lehi Main - 11 minutes". Lehi?!? I swear I didn't pass Lehi to get to In 'N Out. That's gotta be way too far south. But how can that be? I know I got on the North bound entrance. I know I did... well, I... I think I did...

A few short minutes I passed a sign that said I was coming up on the 146000 south exit and then I knew. I had gotten of the south bound freeway just to get back on it again. Doh! So I got off the freeway and got back on going in the right direction. For reals this time.

*kloveyabye*

P.S.

In all actuality I got lost three times tonight. The third was when I had exited the freeway for the second time. I was so worried about getting on the wrong entrance again that I went right past the entrance and got onto some weird windy road. Luckily, I knew that I had missed it because, well, I wasn't on the freeway. Yes, sometimes I do actually pay attention to my surroundings...

my little gabishna

Today is my niece Gabrielle Nicole's twelfth birthday. Twelve... sheesh. I can't believe you're twelve already, time has gone by too fast. I still remember when you were born. Your mom flipped me off when I was taking a picture of her during a contraction. It wasn't because she was having a contraction that she flipped me off but because I told her that women in labor shouldn't be smiling.

Anyway, I had the great pleasure of seeing you enter this world. It was a bit weird for a 12 year old to witness. There was blood and goop and many other things but it was so worth it. I don't really remember much about it other than the fact that I was so excited that you were finally here with us and that soon you'd be coming back home with us since your parents were in the midst of moving.

I remember waking you up all the time so that you'd cry and then I'd have an excuse to hold you. Not exactly the nicest thing to do but I loved holding you and having you with us. You were such a beautiful and happy little baby. When I would take you for walks around the neighborhood people would always stop and say how gorgeous you were. How could you blame them? You had big clear blue eyes, curly golden blonde locks, the cutest fat rolls I have ever beheld and the sweetest smile ever. I remember how you and I spent one afternoon "talking" about what your future job would be. I'm not sure if you know this or not but we had decided on either a ballerina or a doctor.

You are such an amazing person

Gabishna. I think one of your best attributes is your capacity to love. You have such a big welcoming heart. You love everyone you come across and are always willing to help those in need.

You are the smartest kid I know. Period. You're hunger for knowledge is rivaled by only one person and that's your father. You have always been able to converse well with others, even when you were a child. I remember taking you on Trax and you would always strike up conversation with the people around us. They were always amazed, as was I , that someone so young was able to carry on a conversation with such maturity and confidence. None of that has changed, especially now that you and your brother are like miniature lawyers thanks to your dad. Do you remember when you and Ryan went to grandma's work and spoke with some of the attorneys there? They were amazed that you not only knew legal jargon and policies but that you could actually give examples of them that work correctly. Seriously, you have a brain like Einstein's.

I am the luckiest aunt ever because I have you in my life. You have made me remember what it is to enjoy life and live it to its fullest. You are the best niece anyone could ever ask for and I am so happy to call myself your aunt.

Love you like crazy Gabby

xoxo, Bubba