In 2010 I've decided that I really want to work on me and becoming a better more awesomer me. Yes I said awesomer. Yes I know it's not really a word. But it should be.
So this is my list of things to become even more awesomer at for 2010.
1. Be more positive about myself. I have a truly horrible tendency to put myself down about anything and everything. This year I want to strive to build myself up instead. In order to do this is have decided to concentrate on what I do like about myself and recite a mantra whenever I do feel down. I've been saying this mantra for a little while now and it's actually worked.
"I am a good person. I am beautiful. I am interesting and have many things to share with others. I am loveable. My family loves me. My friends love me. My Heavenly Father loves me."
2. I want to be more involved in church. I want to be active in church. Not just physically but spiritually.
I love love LOVE the Draper Temple and I often go there when I need to think or when I just feel down. I am always in awe of it's beauty and the magnificence of what it holds. I want to be able to go into the temple and not just stand outside it looking in. I want to be in it. To feel the Spirit so deeply while doing His work. I miss that feeling and I want it back so very badly.
In order to this I need to fully commit to being an active member of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints. I will pray to my Heavenly Father and Savior regularly with an open heart and mind, I will read and ponder the scriptures daily, I will pay full tithing every paycheck, I will learn to rely upon my Savior and others when I need help, I will fulfill my calling to the best of my ability, I will attend church every Sunday and really pay attention to the lessons given. I will do the things which the Lord hath commanded so that I may go to his House once again.
3. I am going to be a nicer person. I am generally a nice person but my thoughts are sometimes not so nice. I feel like I've become hardened. I get annoyed too easily by little petty things and I make them into big things which makes me become some witch of person. It's pretty nor is it ok. This year I strive to keep petty things from getting me angry and focus on the things and, more importantly, people I love.
4. I am going to gain health. I need to lose weight. There's no hiding from that fact. But the idea of losing weight seems to have bad connotations to me. No one ever likes to lose things. So I have decided to approach it from a more positive angle and decide to gain health.
I have always been a big person. I don't ever remember not being overweight. It's all I have ever known and it's scary to think that my life is going to change. The way people act and react will change around me. But I need to do it. I don't need to be a super skinny person who wears a size 2. That's not me and I need to be me - a healthier me.
And in order to do that I need to eat healthy home cooked foods. I need to limit the number of times I go out to eat. When I do go out, I need to make healthier choices in what and how much I eat. I need to stop making food the enemy. It is what gives me energy so I can work, go to school and be with my family and friends. I need to learn to work with it not against it. I need to drink more water and cut down on all the soda. I need to exercise daily so that my muscles will get stronger and my heart healthier. I enjoy working out. It makes me feel good and alive.
5. School will be my main focus. School is what will get me to where I want to be. But it won't happen if I don't make it a priority. I will remember that getting a good grade in class is worth more than watching The Office.
I think that's about it. I have lots of stuff to work on this year but it's going to be good and very exciting. I'll keep you posted on things.
What are your goals for the new year?